I don't often get the chance to go Sunday evening services because I work at a deli most Sunday nights, so when the opportunity came up I went NUTS doing things with families and friends through church. It was about 5pm before I realized I could still make it to evening service so I scarfed down the Mexican food I was eating and burned rubber to get there.
Tonight was pretty intense. I hate considering people that show up for evenings to be "for real" believers, but it does take a higher amount of dedication to show up at church when it's not normally expected. Serously, people go to church on Sunday Day, it's the American way and that's how it's always been. But to show up at night, or on a Wednesday, or maybe a Friday for whatever reason... takes some dedication.
The thing I enjoy the most (and one that I've almost forgotten the sweet taste of) is the degree of fellowship amongst us these nights. It just seems calmer and allows a heaviness take up residence that maybe isn't noticed because of the bustle of morning worship.
Tonight was no different, but there really was sort of a "thickness" about this evening. I even told somebody "that was a THICK sermon" and they knew exactly what I meant before I had to explain. Just... thick. I don't know. It's times like these where I feel so broken because I think I'm coming along nicely in my faith and then something happens where I get this feeling that I'm like a little kid who's seeing something simple, like GRASS, for the very first time.
There are a lot of people who, although they claim to be believers, maybe don't get what it means to truly celebrate God. For the longest time I thought it was just manufactured posturing but now I know better. And I don't mean just being happy that they're saved, I mean just celebrating God just because He's God. The desire to want to do that comes from God, and it's my sincere hope that everyone whose heart is Jesus' home experience just one good taste of what it's like to be fully centered on God, not caring about what else is going on, and then suddenly realizing that they're surrounded by fellow believers who are on the same wavelength. It's truly wonderful. Again, I feel blessed that a God such as ours would even allow such dirty fools into His presence, but that it pleases Him to show us His glory by doing something as simple as letting us see what He's doing... and then to take that a step further and let US be pleased by pleasing Him.
Just wow. I'm done. Praise God.